


Where It Started

by artikgato



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Blood, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, M/M, mention of violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-09
Updated: 2016-06-09
Packaged: 2018-07-13 22:45:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7140824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artikgato/pseuds/artikgato
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He hadn't seen it coming, hadn't had time to prepare, hadn't been able to see the warning signs, because Souji was a guy and he, Yosuke Hanamura, couldn't possibly fall for a guy, right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where It Started

Perhaps it was the moment he felt a pair of strong, warm hands on his waist, tugging him out of the trash can he'd somehow managed to lodge himself inside on the second day of the new semester.

Maybe it was when Souji said "you're incredible" instead of just offering empty sympathy, like everyone else did, when their afternoon snack was interrupted by flaky part-timers and complaining housewives.

It's possible that it had happened at some point in the TV, when they were both high on adrenaline, the light had caught Souji at just the right angle, and...

It was definitely before Souji hugged him and let him cry into his shoulder. How long before that, Yosuke had no idea, but by the time he felt Souji's arms close around him, he was already a goner.

It was nothing like how it had been with Saki-sempai. Sure, he'd liked her well enough, he'd had a terribly misguided crush on her, but it was completely different to he felt about Souji. It was like comparing a candle flame to a bonfire - they were both fire, sure but aside from that there was no comparison at all. He'd wanted to see Saki-sempai smile, maybe brighten up her day a little. He would hand Souji the world on a platter or die trying if it would make Souji even a little bit happier. He wanted to be around Souji all the time, and knew he couldn't. The fact that he shouldn't have even been _able_ to feel this way about Souji, another guy, was all the more reason that this was something totally different. His feelings for Saki-sempai had been an innocent, harmless crush. This thing, with Souji, this was...

Love. It was love.

Try as he might, Yosuke couldn't figure out the exact moment he'd fallen for him, either. It had just crept up on him, all of a sudden, and before he knew it he was already in way too deep. He hadn't seen it coming, hadn't had time to prepare, hadn't been able to see the warning signs, because Souji was a _guy_ and he, Yosuke Hanamura, couldn't possibly fall for a _guy_ , right?

Laying side-by-side with him on the riverbank, gasping from exertion, feeling bruises and sore muscles and a split lip, he shouldn't have been _happy_. But the rush of joy from feeling his other self take on a new form, changing from Jiraiya into Susano-o, eclipsed any pain or discomfort he might have been feeling from their fight. He hoped it was the same for Souji. He wanted to roll over and kiss away every bruise, smooth away every smear of mud, but he couldn't. He wanted Souji to know his feelings, that much was true, but he was terrified of the consequences. This bond they had was too precious, too fragile, to risk destroying with his own selfishness. The idea that Souji might return his feelings didn't even occur to him. How could someone so amazing feel the same way about _him_?

But then Nanako was kidnapped, and in one night Souji's life was thrown into chaos. The mad dash they made to the top of the Heaven dungeon left them all exhausted, but they all forgot their exhaustion when they finally caught up to Namatame. And in the ensuing battle...

God, he could still feel the sticky warmth of Souji's blood as his own kunai left a gash in his upper arm. The knife's trajectory had been for his throat, though, and Yosuke felt chilled to the bone when he realized that only his own desperation to stop it had broken the mind control and saved his best friend's life.

It was for that reason - and a whole laundry list of other reasons, including not wanting Souji to be alone after such an ordeal - that had led to him standing outside Souji's house at 2am, shivering and suddenly sure this wasn't a good idea, phone in hand. Souji answered the door wordlessly, eyes looking haunted, and for a few breathless moments Yosuke was sure he was going to slam the door in his face but - no, he didn't. He beckoned him inside with a wordless gesture and shut the door behind him.

He wanted to just tell him _everything_. 'I'm sorry'. 'We did everything we could.' 'She'll be fine, I know it.' 'I'm here for you.' 'God, I'm so, so sorry.' 'I love you.'

The gash on his arm had been healed _hours_ ago. There was only a thin pink line to even indicate where it had been at all. Yosuke had seen it happen, _felt_ it happen, it had been his own damned Diarama spell after all. Too powerful for a cut like that, but in his own panic he'd overdone it. It wasn't the cut that mattered, it was the fact that, had his own will not been strong enough, he could have _killed_ -

He tried to ask Souiji if he was feeling okay, tried to do something other than stare at him from across the dark kitchen. Instead he ended up stumbling towards him, reaching out and grabbing his arm where he'd cut it - gently, gently - and was pulled into a hug instead.

"It's fine, Yosuke," Souji said, into his shoulder. "You healed it."

He'd healed the wound, but that didn't do anything to change the situation.

"I could've killed you," he choked out. He tried to hold back his tears, but he'd already cried on Souji once before anyway, and it was harder to fight them now, exhausted as he was.

"But you didn't," Souji murmured in response. His hands were making comforting circular gestures on his back, and exhausted, terrified Yosuke just wanted nothing more than to sink into that embrace, even for just a minute. He sighed and let his head rest against Souji's shoulder. He was supposed to be here to provide support, not the other way around. Even though they were standing up and he was still wearing his winter clothes, he felt his eyes starting to drift closed.

"I love you," he muttered, voice quiet. He felt Souji's hands stop as he went completely still, even his breath. Yosuke's eyes widened when he realized what he'd said. "I...uh, I mean-" Amidst his protesting, he felt Souji shove him back, arms on his shoulders, and there were tired, terrified silver eyes searching his face, Souji's expression disbelieving. "I mean... you-" And then all of a sudden Souji was pulling him closer again, and there were lips against his. Cold, cracked, trembling lips, but lips nonetheless.

Yosuke still had no idea when exactly he'd started to fall for Souji, and he had no idea when Souji had fallen for him, but here, in the cold, dark kitchen as the two of them, exhausted nearly to the point of breaking, shared a quick, trembling kiss... here is where it really started for them.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry it's so short! I've had writer's block for like two weeks and this is all I managed to write. I'm playing Golden for the first time as I approach the day that I started playing P4 for the first time last year, and when I go to Yosuke's Rank 4 Social Link event and saw the option to say "You're incredible" I knew I needed to write something with that, and I've always been fascinated with the emotional impact being mind controlled by Namatame's shadow would have on Yosuke in particular. I'll probably explore that again in a more fleshed-out fic, but in the meantime have this.


End file.
